Day 192 - Limited Answers

365 daily emails to help you through the grieving process Grief support groups: Click here to find a GriefShare group near you. If you would like to find a group for a friend or relative, try our Search Page. Want to read ahead or resend a previous daily email? Click Here Limited Answers Day 192 Here is the challenge: Do not use your suffering as a time to discover if you believe in God, but focus instead on discovering what you believe about Him. In times of suffering, God does not change, but what you believe about Him, what you understand about Him, may. You will likely have questions to which you will never receive answers. It is human nature to want all the pieces to fit, to want to make sense of things. But there are times when that will not happen. "I was real angry because I couldn't get answers," says Dora of her daughter's death. "I now realize that there really is no logical reason why my daughter suffered. It is what it is, and to say that she suffered and died for my betterment or for our growth does not make sense. So I've come to realize that I'll never get an answer to that question." As a human living on this side of death, you will not receive answers that truly satisfy you. The only satisfaction will come when you accept Jesus as Lord of your life and live each day seeking to walk in His Spirit. "Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known" (1 Corinthians 13:12). God, instead of focusing on the questions, I want to start focusing on the Answer—You. Help me to better understand Your attributes and Your plan for my life. Amen. Grieving with Hope This GriefShare-based book contains short, topical chapters addressing issues that grieving people face but are often hesitant to mention to others; it gently guides people to determine whether they're grieving in a way that leads to hope and ultimate healing. Look for Grieving with Hope by Samuel Hodges and Kathy Leonard at a local or online bookstore or at griefshare.org/hope. If you would like to recommend these daily emails to a friend, please click here and choose one of the options under Share. For more information about GriefShare, including how to sign up for these daily emails, please click here. All scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. NIV®. Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved. Copyright © 2003-2013 by The Church Initiative, Inc., All rights reserved. No part of this material may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying and recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without explicit permission in writing from Church Initiative. You subscribed to this daily email through www.griefshare.org. We value your privacy! We will never give, sell, rent, or otherwise share your email or personal information with any other organization — EVER. To remove this email address from further mailings Click Here while connected to the internet. If you have any problems or concerns, please contact dailyemailsupport@griefshare.org. GriefShare 250 S. Allen Rd. Wake Forest, NC 27587 (800) 395-5755

Day 191 - Spiritual Doubts

365 daily emails to help you through the grieving process Grief support groups: Click here to find a GriefShare group near you. If you would like to find a group for a friend or relative, try our Search Page. Want to read ahead or resend a previous daily email? Click Here Spiritual Doubts Day 191 The death of a loved one can leave you feeling spiritually off balance. Question God, but allow Him to work mightily in you. Shelly's teenage son appeared to be doing well when, unexpectedly, he completed suicide. She says, "I did go through one period where I was so upset that I probably had my faith shaken to the deepest that it has ever been shaken. I said, 'Lord, it is not supposed to happen like this.' We prayed for the prodigal return. We prayed for the change around. We prayed, and it was happening. And everything was going the way it should have. Hope was restored in our hearts, and then to have this happen. "I can remember being upset to the point of saying, 'Well, Lord, have we been believing all this in vain? Are You there, or is this just another myth like so many in our history have tried to create because they couldn't understand why things happened the way they did?' When I look over that period of questioning, I think that is probably what has caused me to grow and be so much greater a Christian." Your greatest spiritual growth comes through your questions and trials. You may not like a situation, but often you must accept it and seek growth, not stagnation. Is God a myth? You will find the answer to this question is an unequivocal no. Allow Him to show you His glorious power and might. "God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast" (1 Peter 5:10). Almighty God of the universe, forgive me when I limit You, doubt You, and expect You to fail me. I am so small compared to You, yet You love me more than I can comprehend. Amen. Through a Season of Grief The daily email messages you are receiving are also available in a book format. Purchase as a gift for a friend or buy a print copy for yourself. Through a Season of Grief by Bill Dunn and Kathy Leonard is available at online and local bookstores or at griefshare.org/devotional. If you would like to recommend these daily emails to a friend, please click here and choose one of the options under Share. For more information about GriefShare, including how to sign up for these daily emails, please click here. All scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. NIV®. Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved. Copyright © 2003-2013 by The Church Initiative, Inc., All rights reserved. No part of this material may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying and recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without explicit permission in writing from Church Initiative. You subscribed to this daily email through www.griefshare.org. We value your privacy! We will never give, sell, rent, or otherwise share your email or personal information with any other organization — EVER. To remove this email address from further mailings Click Here while connected to the internet. If you have any problems or concerns, please contact dailyemailsupport@griefshare.org. GriefShare 250 S. Allen Rd. Wake Forest, NC 27587 (800) 395-5755

Day 190 - What to Do With the Whys?

365 daily emails to help you through the grieving process Grief support groups: Click here to find a GriefShare group near you. If you would like to find a group for a friend or relative, try our Search Page. Want to read ahead or resend a previous daily email? Click Here What to Do With the Whys? Day 190 "What do you do with the whys?" asks Kay Arthur after her husband died by suicide. She answers, "You have to lay them at the feet of Omniscience and, by faith, leave them there and say, 'If You want to show me why, God, fine. If not, I'm going to cling to who You are and what You promise.' When you're asking why, and you're in the dark, and you don't have any reasons, you are to cling to Him in hope. He is the God of all hope. The thing that you have to realize is you are here for a much larger purpose than you realize." Hope in God, knowing that your questions may not be answered. Each day make a point to look beyond your situation to the all-knowing God of truth, who will not leave you nor fail you. Learn about His attributes and cling to them in hope. The path of life that you travel is different from what you expected, but He will guide you. "I will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along unfamiliar paths I will guide them; I will turn the darkness into light before them and make the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them" (Isaiah 42:16). Lord, I am truly in the dark, and it scares me. In my fear, I lash out wildly. Shine Your light in my heart. Lead me along this new path. Amen. Grieving with Hope This GriefShare-based book contains short, topical chapters addressing issues that grieving people face but are often hesitant to mention to others; it gently guides people to determine whether they're grieving in a way that leads to hope and ultimate healing. Look for Grieving with Hope by Samuel Hodges and Kathy Leonard at a local or online bookstore or at griefshare.org/hope. If you would like to recommend these daily emails to a friend, please click here and choose one of the options under Share. For more information about GriefShare, including how to sign up for these daily emails, please click here. All scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. NIV®. Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved. Copyright © 2003-2013 by The Church Initiative, Inc., All rights reserved. No part of this material may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying and recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without explicit permission in writing from Church Initiative. You subscribed to this daily email through www.griefshare.org. We value your privacy! We will never give, sell, rent, or otherwise share your email or personal information with any other organization — EVER. To remove this email address from further mailings Click Here while connected to the internet. If you have any problems or concerns, please contact dailyemailsupport@griefshare.org. GriefShare 250 S. Allen Rd. Wake Forest, NC 27587 (800) 395-5755

Day 189 - Questions Are Natural

365 daily emails to help you through the grieving process Grief support groups: Click here to find a GriefShare group near you. If you would like to find a group for a friend or relative, try our Search Page. Want to read ahead or resend a previous daily email? Click Here Questions Are Natural Day 189 It is natural to have questions when unwanted and unexpected loss comes into your life. The more traumatic the loss, the greater the questions. Dr. Tim Clinton says, "Not long ago when I lost my mother, I struggled with the question why. Why so early? Why so quickly? When you ask why, you are in essence validating your own humanness and realizing you are not in control." Express your questions freely, but realize that you cannot control your life or anyone else's. The sovereign God is higher than all, and His ways are beyond comprehension. "'For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,' declares the Lord" (Isaiah 55:8). Sovereign God, I have so many whys. I could go on and on, but nothing will change no matter how many times I ask. I do not understand this. I do not understand You. But I realize I am not meant to. You, O Lord, are high above all, and I must give my questions to You once and for all. Amen. Through a Season of Grief The daily email messages you are receiving are also available in a book format. Purchase as a gift for a friend or buy a print copy for yourself. Through a Season of Grief by Bill Dunn and Kathy Leonard is available at online and local bookstores or at griefshare.org/devotional. If you would like to recommend these daily emails to a friend, please click here and choose one of the options under Share. For more information about GriefShare, including how to sign up for these daily emails, please click here. All scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. NIV®. Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved. Copyright © 2003-2013 by The Church Initiative, Inc., All rights reserved. No part of this material may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying and recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without explicit permission in writing from Church Initiative. You subscribed to this daily email through www.griefshare.org. We value your privacy! We will never give, sell, rent, or otherwise share your email or personal information with any other organization — EVER. To remove this email address from further mailings Click Here while connected to the internet. If you have any problems or concerns, please contact dailyemailsupport@griefshare.org. GriefShare 250 S. Allen Rd. Wake Forest, NC 27587 (800) 395-5755

Day 188 - The Why of Death

365 daily emails to help you through the grieving process Grief support groups: Click here to find a GriefShare group near you. If you would like to find a group for a friend or relative, try our Search Page. Want to read ahead or resend a previous daily email? Click Here The Why of Death Day 188 Right now you might not be feeling very close to God. You might be thinking, Where is God? Does God really care? How could He let this happen? What does my future hold? Dr. Robert Jeffress shares the response of a man who lost three of his seven children through horrible deaths to leukemia: "When somebody asks him, 'How could you keep believing in a God who would allow you and your children to experience such a tragedy?', this is what he says, 'In those kind of experiences you have two choices: You can either give up or you can keep believing in God even when it doesn't make sense. Faith means something when it's exercised in the darkness.'" Dr. Jeffress adds his own insight: "I believe that faith means something when you don't understand the whys. I don't think God ever condemns you for asking why. But in the ultimate analysis, the question is not why but it is Who? God calls on you to believe in Him who said, 'I am the way, the truth, and the life. No man comes to the Father but by me. I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live again' [John 14:6, 11:25]. Ultimately you must trust in that." Lord God, I have so many questions and doubts and feelings of guilt and blame. Where do I go from here? Lead me in Your way, truth, and life. Amen. Grieving with Hope This GriefShare-based book contains short, topical chapters addressing issues that grieving people face but are often hesitant to mention to others; it gently guides people to determine whether they're grieving in a way that leads to hope and ultimate healing. Look for Grieving with Hope by Samuel Hodges and Kathy Leonard at a local or online bookstore or at griefshare.org/hope. If you would like to recommend these daily emails to a friend, please click here and choose one of the options under Share. For more information about GriefShare, including how to sign up for these daily emails, please click here. All scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. NIV®. Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved. Copyright © 2003-2013 by The Church Initiative, Inc., All rights reserved. No part of this material may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying and recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without explicit permission in writing from Church Initiative. You subscribed to this daily email through www.griefshare.org. We value your privacy! We will never give, sell, rent, or otherwise share your email or personal information with any other organization — EVER. To remove this email address from further mailings Click Here while connected to the internet. If you have any problems or concerns, please contact dailyemailsupport@griefshare.org. GriefShare 250 S. Allen Rd. Wake Forest, NC 27587 (800) 395-5755

Day 187 - Helping Children Grieve

365 daily emails to help you through the grieving process Grief support groups: Click here to find a GriefShare group near you. If you would like to find a group for a friend or relative, try our Search Page. Want to read ahead or resend a previous daily email? Click Here Helping Children Grieve Day 187 Children can accept loss if there is something to hope for, something to look forward to. But if they view their lives as one loss after another, recovery is extremely difficult. Here are some general guidelines in helping your children grieve: Understand that children have feelings even if they do not show them. A child's initial response, like adults, is denial. Tell your children about the feelings you are struggling with. Tell them they are not responsible for the loss. Help them understand what has happened. Share just enough details to satisfy their questions, avoiding anything that would traumatize them. Be there for them. They need more than words. Your presence can help them grieve the loss. Help them remember the good times and encourage them to share their emotions. Empathize with their hurt without condoning any wrong behavior. "Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you!" (Isaiah 49:15). Lord, You love my children even more than I do. Give me the wisdom to care for them and nurture them through my grief. Amen. Through a Season of Grief The daily email messages you are receiving are also available in a book format. Purchase as a gift for a friend or buy a print copy for yourself. Through a Season of Grief by Bill Dunn and Kathy Leonard is available at online and local bookstores or at griefshare.org/devotional. If you would like to recommend these daily emails to a friend, please click here and choose one of the options under Share. For more information about GriefShare, including how to sign up for these daily emails, please click here. All scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. NIV®. Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved. Copyright © 2003-2013 by The Church Initiative, Inc., All rights reserved. No part of this material may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying and recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without explicit permission in writing from Church Initiative. You subscribed to this daily email through www.griefshare.org. We value your privacy! We will never give, sell, rent, or otherwise share your email or personal information with any other organization — EVER. To remove this email address from further mailings Click Here while connected to the internet. If you have any problems or concerns, please contact dailyemailsupport@griefshare.org. GriefShare 250 S. Allen Rd. Wake Forest, NC 27587 (800) 395-5755

Day 186 - Don't Hide Your Emotions

365 daily emails to help you through the grieving process Grief support groups: Click here to find a GriefShare group near you. If you would like to find a group for a friend or relative, try our Search Page. Want to read ahead or resend a previous daily email? Click Here Don’t Hide Your Emotions Day 186 Do not try to hide your feelings from your children. You will not be successful! Think back over the past few days and identify times when you held back your true emotions and "put on a happy face" for the sake of your children. Your children are experiencing different degrees of the same feelings you are. If you cover up your emotions, your children will follow your example. One suggestion to help your family communicate their emotions to each other is with a "Feelings Chart." Write on the chart "Today I feel …" and attach a piece of Velcro in the space after "feel." (You may want to have a space for each family member.) Then, draw faces or write down emotions on several circles of heavy paper and attach Velcro on the backs. Include as many different emotions as you can think of. Remember that younger children may need simpler words and pictures, but older children and adults will need a wide range of words to help them better identify and express their emotions. Here are some ideas, which can be adapted to meet your needs: sad, lonely, angry, confused, guilty, bitter, rejected, helpless, afraid, worried, disappointed, resentful, jealous, inadequate, vindictive, depressed, lost, abandoned, betrayed, sorrowful, better, so-so, relieved, okay, not bad, hopeful, peaceful, reassured, thankful, secure, insecure, unloved, loved, encouraged, joyful. Each day find the emotion that best describes how you feel at any given time and place that word on the chart. Have your other family members do this as well. God promises to be with you through all of your emotional turmoil. He also promises to comfort, heal, and strengthen you. God's Word is full of promises for you. "There hath not failed one word of all his good promise" (1 Kings 8:56 KJV). Thank you, Father, that You will never fail me. Help me to see the big picture beyond my tangled emotions. Amen. Grieving with Hope This GriefShare-based book contains short, topical chapters addressing issues that grieving people face but are often hesitant to mention to others; it gently guides people to determine whether they're grieving in a way that leads to hope and ultimate healing. Look for Grieving with Hope by Samuel Hodges and Kathy Leonard at a local or online bookstore or at griefshare.org/hope. If you would like to recommend these daily emails to a friend, please click here and choose one of the options under Share. For more information about GriefShare, including how to sign up for these daily emails, please click here. All scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. NIV®. Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved. Copyright © 2003-2013 by The Church Initiative, Inc., All rights reserved. No part of this material may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying and recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without explicit permission in writing from Church Initiative. You subscribed to this daily email through www.griefshare.org. We value your privacy! We will never give, sell, rent, or otherwise share your email or personal information with any other organization — EVER. To remove this email address from further mailings Click Here while connected to the internet. If you have any problems or concerns, please contact dailyemailsupport@griefshare.org. GriefShare 250 S. Allen Rd. Wake Forest, NC 27587 (800) 395-5755