Day 224 - Bad Grief

365 daily emails to help you through the grieving process Grief support groups: Click here to find a GriefShare group near you. If you would like to find a group for a friend or relative, try our Search Page. Want to read ahead or resend a previous daily email? Click Here Bad Grief Day 224 Grief is a process. A process is a series of actions and gradual changes that one progresses through. The grieving process involves forward movement—going from one emotion, one level, one day to the next. There is such a thing as good grief. It involves identifying the loss, recognizing the grieving process, accepting that life will never be the same, and continuing forward on the journey. There is also bad grief: continually thinking about the person who died and refusing to let him or her go. "Let me give you an example of bad grief," says Dr. Erwin Lutzer. "Here's a woman whose husband has been dead for fifteen years, and she will not touch his study, but leaves it exactly as he left it, fearing that if she were to touch it or sell the books, it would be a sign of dishonor and disrespect. "Let me give you another example of bad grief. A woman convinced her husband to go to a concert that he didn't want to go to. So they go to this concert, and he's killed in a car accident. For fourteen years she goes to his grave every single morning, bemoaning the fact that she convinced him to go to something that he didn't want to go to. That grief is not of God. That is bad grief." Grief that is not of God will not bring healing and peace. Humble yourself before God, and seek His forgiveness if you have a preoccupation with your lost loved one and have refused to let him or her go. "Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you" (1 Peter 5:6-7). Holy God, it is hard to let go. Forgive me for holding on so tightly. Help me to release my feelings and fears and to look for Your ray of sunshine each day. Amen. Grieving with Hope This GriefShare-based book contains short, topical chapters addressing issues that grieving people face but are often hesitant to mention to others; it gently guides people to determine whether they're grieving in a way that leads to hope and ultimate healing. Look for Grieving with Hope by Samuel Hodges and Kathy Leonard at a local or online bookstore or at griefshare.org/hope. If you would like to recommend these daily emails to a friend, please click here and choose one of the options under Share. For more information about GriefShare, including how to sign up for these daily emails, please click here. All scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. NIV®. Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved. Copyright © 2003-2013 by The Church Initiative, Inc., All rights reserved. No part of this material may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying and recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without explicit permission in writing from Church Initiative. You subscribed to this daily email through www.griefshare.org. We value your privacy! We will never give, sell, rent, or otherwise share your email or personal information with any other organization — EVER. To remove this email address from further mailings Click Here while connected to the internet. If you have any problems or concerns, please contact dailyemailsupport@griefshare.org. GriefShare 250 S. Allen Rd. Wake Forest, NC 27587 (800) 395-5755